Marital Bliss

So, today was a very fun day. A day that also kinda irritated me, from a 'legal' standpoint, excited to see two friends join in Holy Matrimony, sad because I am still not married, and elated that, I'm still not married (c'mon, we all know that the day I get married, the apocalypse will occur). Chris and Heather were married today, February 4th, 2006. It was a joyous event. Everyone laughed, because they played an interesting choice for the processional song after the announcing the bride and groom, the 'Superman' theme song. I was waiting to see Christopher Reeves, fly in and do something crazy (although he passed away over a year ago), or Gene Hackman hold the whole place up for ransom...he was a great Lex Luthor. I was a groomsman, I had to wear a tux, therefore, I found me a shoulder holster. Finally, I found a use for the Christmas gift my father got me, that didn't involve me doing anything to get me in trouble. I like it when I can do things and not get in trouble (people enjoyed my idea). I went straight mobster with my Walther P99. Pimpin' the side-arm under the tux. Thats right, take a look. Women love a man who carries some iron.
So thats how I get ladies to hold onto my arm. I wish I had thought of it sooner. I really do. Ah well. I look straight thug.

In the wedding pictures, I quietly flashed the gun in multiple pictures (made it look like a real Texas wedding). The entire wedding party loved it (one of the Grooms relatives challenged me to see who's gun was bigger, but I chose not to pursue that, I think that was a wise move). Someone asked me if I was an off-duty CCPD officer, and my response was, 'no, just a member of the local crime syndicate, I'm a part of THE family). It was fun, and now I WANT my concealed handgun license, and a real Walther P99 (you know, if I cant get a new set of clubs for graduation, a real Walther would rock *hint hint*). It would be great to shoot bad guys.

So, now you are asking, 'What was it that made you mad?', and It's quite simple. The photographer threw a fit because people were taking pictures at the wedding. She claimed the contract that was signed gave her EXCLUSIVE rights to all the pictures, and that if other took pictures, they were in breach of the contract. What a load of pure grade A horse manure. My picture was taken quite a few times, (c'mon, I was the dude with the shoulder holster and gun) and that meant that they were copyrighting pictures of me. ONLY I OWN THE RIGHTS TO MY IMAGE! ME! I did not give consent to exclusive image rights to the photographer, and therefore, if they sell any pictures of me (which they have copyrighted), I legally deserve a piece of the profit of images of me (since I own the franchise). Oh brother, I wish I had a lawyer friend. Anywho, for those of you who missed it, check me out at the wedding, and how I finally got the ladies to swarm all over me.
Gee, that is just an awesome picture. Straight out of the 1920's. I could have been the next Al Capone (That or Elliot Ness). Guns are great, God bless the 2nd Amendment!

The gun katas. Through analysis of thousands of recorded gunfights, the Cleric has determined that the geometric distribution of antagonists in any gun battle is a statistically predictable element. The gun kata treats the gun as a total weapon, each fluid position representing a maximum kill zone, inflicting maximum damage on the maximum number of opponents while keeping the defender clear of the statistically traditional trajectories of return fire. By the rote mastery of this art, your firing efficiency will rise by no less than 120%. The difference of a 63% increase to lethal proficiency makes the master of the gun katas an adversary not to be taken lightly.